???**Where is Thailand**???

Found this graffitti yesterday and thought it was fantastic (also notice the details in the poster on bottom-left.) And I think it has some application to the monologue that I'm about to write....

I suppose I might as well just come out and say it...I won't be moving to Thailand...at least not in the forseable future. I know it may be a shock for some of you - because I came here so sure that this was where I was headed. But it's odd, because once I got here I didn't feel so sure. Aware of that, I searched and asked myself why. I remained open and sought to observe and experience what I came across in this city. And at every interaction it was the people and issues in America that stood out to me and called at my heart the most.

I don't feel at all silly for coming here. I see a definate purpose in it. It's released me from my own expectations that I need to go overseas. It's validified that one should really stop and listen to one's heart before going this direction or that in lifes decisions. It can't be my goal to set out and save the world - because I would fail utterably. But it is in my heart to work for change. It is in my heart (and my brain and my gut) to make my best attempt to honor Christ, along with all that that means. In coming here I feel like now I can finally be 'sent' to my own inner city - whether that be around SF or Vegas.

And now for the first time (at least since 9th grade) I am void of a "PLAN." And its kind of exciting. I don't know what comes next. I don't have an expectation. I don't know what to look for. But I think that's a good spot - because I'll be looking...as I move along in this little world.

Where is Thailand? It's still here. That place in my heart is still here. But for now Thailand might be San Francisco, or Vegas; it might be being a nurse, or an artist, or an educator. The possibilities are endless - but as I walk, I'm sure I'll get there - as in fact I'm already there.